Friday, November 25, 2011

Happy Thanksgiving

It's been a really good holiday for us. Chris's Mom made it in on Wednesday and the kids have been all over her like white on rice. We only get to see her 3 times a year so its always a joyful occasion for us to see her. We had a huge dinner with my Mom and them. Turkey, mashed potatoes, sweet potato souffle, corn casserole, green beans and rolls. Desserts were fruit salad, Pineapple Goo Cake and a butter pecan cake with cream cheese frosting. We had a good visit with my Dad too and took him dinner also. He had a little of everything but seemed to enjoy his turkey leg best. Cheryl brough both of them for him so they're supposed to give it to him today along with the other leftovers we brought him. He was in a good mood and we had a really good visit with him. Today we're being lazy but we're going to see Nature in Lights tonight. It's a drive through light display on lake Belton that's sponsored by Ft. Hood and other businesses. That's about it for our holiday so far.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Last Saturday

Nov. 18th was fun. I took my Mom and sister Cheryl Christmas shopping that morning. We went and saw my Dad for lunch. Took him Church's chicken and he ate it up. It was a nice visit and he was in a good mood too. After that we went and shopped some more. Then my brother Patrick called and asked if my husband would co-sign for him a truck. I told him no so then my sister Cheryl ended up co-signing for him in spite of not having a driver's license. She was so upset because he only had a year to go on his Durango and now its all back to square one. He got a Chevy Silverado quad cab so at least he can still have room for them all in it. The reason he needs a co-signer is because he's on disability and has no other income. I doubt he'll ever help pay the bills or for food but I don't live there so I'm keeping my mouth shut on this one. The last time I opened my mouth and gave my opinion I lost my little sister Kelly. I haven't seen her since mid-March or spoken to her since April 1st. Its on her though because I've been trying to get a response from her each month but all I ever get to do is leave a voice mail on her cell phone. I took Amanda to her doctor appointment yesterday. She's contracting but still not dialated. Unless she has the baby this next week they'll be doing a c-section on her on Nov. 30th. While I was waiting for her in the waiting room my sister Kelly came in. I just happened to glance up from the magazine I was reading and saw her. She saw me and gave me a look that looked right through me and sat down. I waited a couple of seconds and then went over to her and told her I just wanted to say hi, I love you and bye. Then I went and sat back down. I put the magazine up where she couldn't see that I was close to tears. A few minutes later I glanced in her direction but saw that she moved where she couldn't see me. I finished the magazine and was looking up at the TV when her husband came through the door into the reception area. Kelly must have texted him about seeing me because he didn't come through the waiting room but went in through the reception door to wait for her. I've tried to make amends. I've railed at her. I've apologized. I've cried but after the look she gave me yesterday (Monday) I'm done. I know that I've tried the best I can and now its up to her. The bad thing is she's pregnant and due at the end of December with a little boy. She told my Mom about the baby in an email. :( I found her registered on Target so I was able to send her a baby gift for him but haven't, of course, heard that she got it or not. Last I knew it was on her front porch. They're naming him Andrew Cole. I can just hope and pray that she'll come around and let us know him and get to know Phillip all over again someday. Til then our family feels broken when we should be having a wonderful, happy time expecting two new babies into the family.

Thursday, November 3, 2011


I'm so excited. Chris doesn't go out to work until Tuesday, the 8th so I get to go and see my Dad with the family on Sunday. Usually I have too much to do and am worn out on Sunday from all the running around I have to do on the weekend to go and see him. I just hope nothing happens to change my plans. Well, lets say I have no plans for Sunday and it should turn out okay.

We had a wonderful visit with my Daddy. He ate his small hamburger and fries from Wendy's and also ate his lunch plate that day too. He's gained a little weight back. He knew who Jessie was and that she was his granddaughter and that really made her day. I can't wait to get to go back. It won't be this weekend but the weekend before Thanksgiving and then Thanksgiving day we'll be bringing him dinner that evening. I hope he will have a good day then too.

Last night I didn't really sleep. My mind wouldn't shut down. My sister Kelly still isn't speaking to anybody especially me. I call her once a month on her cell phone. I don't know if she listens to the message or not but I refuse to give up on her as my sister. I don't think I did anything bad enough for her to disown me much less the whole family. I finally broke down crying and realized I'm grieving for her. She's not dead and that's what hurts so badly. She was born when I was 19 years old. It's like I've lost my own child almost. She was spoiled by all of us older kids but she was never a brat. I thought that chat we had back in April went both ways. She was griping about our other sister Cheryl so I was trying to tell her how special she's always been to the family but I overstepped and brought in some personal stuff about how my kids were never allowed to spend the night at my Mom and Dad's when they were 2 like her little boy is. I shouldn't have gone there but if she can't handle the truth what can I do. I've apologized several times and I've also gone off the handle too. Mostly I've tried to be nice. I went off the handle on her on my 50th birthday in June. Well, it was a few days after. She never called or emailed or even snail mailed a card to me. It was an important birthday to me and for her to totally ignore it really hurt. I called her in October to invite them to Jessie's 13th birthday but her anniversary is on the 6th and Jessie's birthday is the 8th so since she's been married she's always celebrated her anniversary by going away for the weekend. That has hurt Jessie's feelings to no end but this year she didn't even ask about Aunt Kelly. :( Nicky's birthday is coming up on Nov. 11th. I'm really excited for him to celebrate it on 11/11/11. He'll be 15 and I've been waiting for that date since the day he was born. I'm going to call and invite them but I know they won't come. At least I'm trying to make up and be good and get her back in the family. Oh yeah, she's also pregnant and due with a little boy on Dec. 30th. She sent my Mom an email when she found out she was pregnant. We heard it was a boy through the work grapevine. My sister Cheryl and niece Amanda both work where Kelly does. They have friends in common and I have a couple of them as friends on Facebook. It's really sad to see pictures posted by them of her on there. Also, I have her Mother in law as a friend. She's a nice lady. Not saying anything to her Mother in law when I've seen her around town is really hard. Her Mother in law posts picture of Phillip, my nephew by Kelly and it breaks my heart that we're not seeing him anymore. I can only imagine how badly it hurts my Mom to see his pictures. What makes me feel really bad is that my sister's husband was estranged from his Father and she made sure to get them together. I guess we don't count. I feel like all the years never counted sometimes. Anyway, that's where my heart and head are now. I'm grieving. Maybe someday I'll have my baby sister back.