Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Sad
I took my Mom to see my Dad yesterday. We had to wait about 45 minutes for him to get out of occupational therapy. Not for walking but they had him making something with his hands. We only stayed about 15 minutes after he got back up there because he was falling asleep on us and very out of it. He still looks bad to me. Really bad. He's gaunt and his skin looks like paper. I hate seeing him this way. It breaks my heart that my Daddy who was taller than anybody else's Daddy and as strong and stubborn as a bull seems to be shrinking before my eyes. I can't imagine what is going through his mind. He usually asks when he can go home but he was too exhausted to even mutter that. I'm so scared for my Mom. She told me she feels like she's deserted him. What can I tell her? Nothing really. I just try to keep reassuring her that she hasn't deserted him. The blessing in all of this is that my Dad doesn't realize when she's not up there at least.
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Oh Karen, it's so hard to see our fathers that way. I took care of my dad when he had cancer and I cried many time when I looked at him. These diseases just eat away at them and it's heartbreaking. I know it's hard but keep going to visit, you'll be glad you spent that time with him. One thing I was glad about was the alone time I had with my dad. Wish I had done it more now that I look back.
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