Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Goodbye Negative Family Member
Ugh! My niece Amanda is 24 going on 25. She has turned into the most negative ninny I've ever known. She needs to grow up and be responsible for her ownself. She will not phone me but uses her phone to contact me on my space. @@ Drives me crazy because everybody who has every used email or messaging of some sort knows that tone and inflection do no come across well in written words. At least for me they don't. The last message I got from her was Sunday night and she let loose on me how I need to watch how I word things to her because I do not know how it is to be her. Okay then......problem solved. I deleted all of our my space accounts and blocked her on our facebook pages. She needs anything she'll have to break down and call me. I'm through with her. She needs help let her go to her friends that she values above family. You know they're the ones always there for her anyway. Yeah I'm that pissed and I'll stay that pissed til she actually calls and talks to me. She'll either get over herself and grow up or just go away and right now I just don't care. It'd be different if she were 18 and just getting started out but my goodness she'll be 25 in September. Grow up little girl! Take on the resposibility of yourself for yourself. She's blaming everybody but herself for not having a car. She said in the last email to me that she wished she would have had the help everybody else did getting a car. Excuse me? No one ever helped me buy a car. Everything I have I worked hard for and Chris works really hard for us too so I don't even know where she got that crap from. Then she says she doesn't think she'll ever be able to have children and that she wishes she'd meet a freaking good guy that wants to be mature. Okay don't go there with me either. I'm sorry her body is screwed up with her female parts. I really am. She only has one kidney too but I would put her first before she should have kids. I'm not saying never and you never know she just might be able to have a baby someday. Medical miracles happen all the time. I just don't want her to die trying to have a baby just cause her little sister who is 19 had a baby and her brother Todd just had his 3rd. Maybe there's a reason God chose her not to actually birth babies? I hate saying that. It sounds awful but maybe she's supposed to adopt or foster kids instead? I never thought I'd have kids. I was 34 before I met Chris let alone thought I'd ever have sex and get pregnant. She's lucky she's had boyfriends in her life. I thought I was horrible or something cause guys only wanted to be friends with me. Never anything more until Chris came along. Then the next sentence she tells me that she can't go see Grandpa because she doesn't have a car. Okay if that's so why didn't she just say that to start? The email before the last one stated she didn't want to see him that she just wanted to remember him the way he was. I wouldn't have told her anything else about going to see him if she would have said that to start. Then she told me to not try to make her feel guilty about Grandma when she's been writing to Grandma and that Grandma knows how she feels about everything. Okay.........that's a new one. She's never mentioned writing to my Mom at all. I doubt that she has. Anyway, I'm through with her. I tried. She's an adult. A really old adult at that and its way beyond time that SHE GROWS UP! She's my niece not my daughter is my new mantra. Sorry for the caps but I feel so much better for getting this all off my chest. After talking to one of my cousins that is trying to help out another cousin that is the same age as Amanda I found out she's having the same sort of problems and stuff with her. Where did these grown adults get the idea that its okay to live off of relatives at their ages? Yes I lived off and on with my parents after I graduated high school and I lived with relatives here and there until Chris and I married but I always paid my own way for everything and helped out when I could with things. These kid adults just want to live off of people. Amanda's brothers are the same as her. They all act like everybody owes them an existance. I give up on them. I think I'm raising my kids right though. They're pretty good kids so far and they fear consequences. The adults in my niece and nephews generation seem to think they shouldn't have consequences it seems. I'm not speaking about every person in that generation. It just seems the ones I know personally have that attitude. I'm sure there are plenty of good adults in that generation. I know there is because I have met a few at least personally.
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Negativity is so infectious. It sounds wise to cut her out of your life for now...until she is ready to meet you partway at least.
ReplyDeletesorry you are dealing with that Karen. I agree, many of our young adults seem to think they are entitled to things and that they shouldn't have to work for them ... the real world is going to be especially cruel to them, once they have run out of people to enable them. all you can do is protect yourself and sometimes pushing the negative people away is all we have.
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